Pygmalion

(1938)
Directed by Anthony Asquith & Leslie Howard
Screenplay by George Bernard Shaw, from his play
Starring Wendy Hiller, Leslie Howard, Wilfred Lawson, Marie Lohr, Scott Sunderland, David Tree.
IMDB Entry

Sometimes a perfectly good movie is overshadowed by its remake. And when the remake is both a classic of musical theater and film -- a glossy color film that was really at the peak of Hollywood's adaptations of Broadway musicals -- well, your small black and white film with an actress who is no longer well known has little chance.

But Pygmalion deserves better. At the very least, it owns one bit of trivia: it won an Oscar for its screenwriter, George Bernard Shaw.  Yes, that Shaw.

When the film was being conceived, Shaw's reputation was secure as  England's greatest living playwright, with a Nobel Prize to prove it. Naturally, film producers wanted to make movies of his plays, but Shaw was reluctant. Eventually, producer Gabriel Pascal convinced him to give a try, promising Shaw creative control.

Shaw took over, writing the screenplay and insisting that his favorite actress, Wendy Hiller, play the part of Eliza.  Hiller was primarily a stage actress, but one of her roles had been Eliza, and she was a perfect choice.

I don't have to summarize the plot; I'm sure you all know it. Leslie Howard was cast as Henry Higgins, with Wilfred Lawson as Eliza's father.

The movie sticks with Shaw's play (of course)*.  And Hiller is just wonderful as Eliza. What really sticks out is a terrific scene when Eliza is first introduced -- not at the Ascot races, as in My Fair Lady -- but to a small gathering including Freddy Einsford-Hill (David Tree).  Eliza has the diction down perfectly, but has a bit of a problem making small talk.

LIZA [darkly] My aunt died of influenza: so they said.
MRS. EYNSFORD HILL [clicks her tongue sympathetically]!!!
LIZA [in the same tragic tone] But it's my belief they done the old woman in.
MRS. HIGGINS [puzzled] Done her in?
LIZA. Y-e-e-e-es, Lord love you! Why should she die of influenza? She come through diphtheria right enough the year before. I saw her with my own eyes. Fairly blue with it, she was. They all thought she was dead; but my father he kept ladling gin down her throat til she came to so sudden that she bit the bowl off the spoon.
MRS. EYNSFORD HILL [startled] Dear me!
LIZA [piling up the indictment] What call would a woman with that strength in her have to die of influenza? What become of her new straw hat that should have come to me? Somebody pinched it; and what I say is, them as pinched it done her in.
MRS. EYNSFORD HILL. What does doing her in mean?
HIGGINS [hastily] Oh, that's the new small talk. To do a person in means to kill them.
MRS. EYNSFORD HILL [to Eliza, horrified] You surely don't believe that your aunt was killed?
LIZA. Do I not! Them she lived with would have killed her for a hat-pin, let alone a hat.

This exchange** is made even funnier by Hiller's delivery as she talks about the dark deeds in the upper class accent that Henry Higgins has worked so hard to develop.  She is absolutely a joy to watch.  And, as a footnote, her line "Not bloody likely!" was the first time that particular epithet was spoken in a film.

The movie was a success, of course.  Hiller was nominated for an Oscar but lost*** and Shaw won.  He spoke disparagingly about the award, but evidently kept it in a place of honor in his home.

Of course, the success of My Fair Lady put Pygmalion in the shadows.****  A full-scale version, in color, with big names obliterated the memory of the original play.

One point was the ending.  Shaw -- an early feminist -- didn't like the idea of Liza ending up with Henry Higgins in the end.  He wrote an ending where walks out on Higgins (with an implication that she might marry Freddy), and what that disappointed audiences looking for a more conventional -- and romantic -- ending, wrote an essay explaining that she married Freddy and was miserable. Even though he had control, the director tacked on a short scene where Eliza came back at the end.  I actually think that today Shaw's ending makes a lot more sense.

In any case, the movie was overshadowed by the glossier Hollywood musical.  That's a shame, since

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*As did the musical, for that matter; there is much dialog in Pygmalion that shows up again in My Fair Lady.

**In the play, but not in My Fair Lady.

***She did win a Best Supporting Actress award in 1958 for Separate Tables.

****The musical was originally considered seemed unlikely to be a hit. The idea of turning Shaw -- a playwright of ideas if ever there was one -- into a Broadway show was taking a big chance.  So much so that the producers, looking for money, turned to CBS and asked them to back the show in exchange for the rights to the original cast album for their Columbia Records division. It worked out pretty well, as the album sold for decades and the musical set records.

R. A. Lafferty (author)

(1914-2002)
Wikipedia Entry

Even without reading the byline, you could always identify a R.A. Lafferty story. He had one of the most individualistic voices in the genre, and one of the most amazing imaginations. Since his best work was in short stories,* he is slowly fading from consciousness.

Lafferty came to science fiction relatively late (especially for the 1960s, when people were breaking in to print in their early 20s).  His first story was published when he was 40, and he didn't begin to establish himself as a writer until his 50s.  He worked for many years as an electrical engineer and still managed to crank out hundreds of stories, and was a regular in Damon Knight's Orbit anthologies and in the magazines of the time.

His stories were generally tall tales. There was a larger-than-life feel to them, and they were filled with surprises.  Some of my favorites included:

• Thus We Frustrate Charlemagne.  A fable on the dangers of messing with time.
• Slow Tuesday Night. A society where everything happens very quickly -- and 15 minutes of fame is a very long time.
• What Was the Name of That Town?  A search to find something not known to exist by a close study of the absence of evidence.  With a brilliant solution.
• Continued on Next Rock. A prehistoric romance of a sort.
• Incased in Ancient Rind. A sad and beautiful tale about pollution and what it brings back.
• Rainbird. The story of an inventor, and the dangers of going too far.
• Euremia's Dam.  The real mother of invention.**

Lafferty merged both Irish and Native American storytelling methods and the result was always a delight.

But Lafferty was never a fan favorite.  He did win a Hugo Award for Euremia's Dam," but he got few award nominations and no other wins.  And the changes in science fiction in the 80s and 90s left Lafferty behind.  He still hadn't lost his skill, but readers didn't appreciate his style any more.  His work tended to be published in smaller SF presses to excellent reviews but little exposure.  I remember one year when the Nebula committee begged someone to publish a Lafferty story so that they could recommend it.

Lafferty died in 2002, pretty much unknown to the Star Wars generation.  His work remains in print, but only in limited editions.  You owe it to yourself to pick some of them up.

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*He wrote quite a few novels, but most did not live up to his short fiction; the only one I found that came close was his Past Master.

**And nothing to do with Frank Zappa, thank you very much.

Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass (Music)

(1960s)
All Music Guide
Herb Alpert Web Page

He was a top music act, playing a style of music that was not only inauthentic, but went against every trend in popular music of the time.  But Herb Alpert made it all work, so much so that at his height, it was not unusual to find his records in collections along with groups like the Doors and the Beatles.

Alpert played trumpet, an instrument that no longer was on the forefront of popular music at the time he was making his mark.  He probably wasn't even the greatest trumpet player of his time. It didn't matter.   He really had two things going for him:  a distinctive sound and the ability to find great, catchy songs and arrange them so that just about anyone could love them.

Alpert got involved in music in the early 50s, and started writing songs with Lou Adler, penning several top twenty hits (best known song these days was probably "Alley Oop").

But Alpert wanted to perform.  Setting up a recording studio in his garage, he started looking for a hit.  Sol Lake, a composer friend, wrote a pleasant little song called "Twinkle Star" that Alpert liked a lot, but wasn't sure how to arrange. While vacationing in Tijuana and pondering the issue, he heard a Mariachi band outside a bullring.

That was the sound he was looking for.  Renaming the song "The Lonely Bull," Alpert recorded it in Mariachi style and added sound effects.  He then pressed the record out of his own pocket and on his own label, then started playing it for local DJs, hiding the fact he was the only one on the record by naming the group "The Tijuana Brass."

It was a smash, reaching number six on the charts.  Alpert and the Tijuana Brass was in business.

And what business it was.  The album of The Lonely Bull was a further smash, with Alpert playing all the music himself (he'd play the trumpet part twice, one slightly out of synch so it sounded like there were two musicians).  After this success, Alpert hired an actual band, which allowed the group to perform at live venues. 

Meanwhile, Alpert put out more smash hits.  His albums Volume 2 and South of the Border were big sellers, but the group really made its mark with Whipped Cream and Other Delights.  The albums iconic cover was guaranteed to catch the eye of people browsing record bins.  It also inspired many parodies and tributes.

 

Alpert wasn't done.  He continued to put out number one albums all through the 60s with music that was peppy and tuneful.  He even had a top ten single by singing* the Bachrach-David "This Guy's in Love With You."  Some of my favorites include "The Lonely Bull," "Tijuana Taxi," "Spanish Flea," "Casino Royale."  All the Tijuana Brass songs were catchy and fun to listen to.  Alpert got away from the Mexican shtick as time went on, but the group remained popular into the 70s.**

Nowadays, it's rare to hear about the Tijuana Brass.  They don't fit into the classic rock format, and the interest in pop instrumentals of the era is limited.  They are probably the biggest chart act of the sixties not to get regular airplay these days.

Alpert continued to play for many years, of course, and had no problem finding a record company.  You see, that little record company Alpert founded to market "The Lonely Bull" just kept going. Named after Alpert and his partner Jerry Moss, A&M Records was one of the most successful labels in the rock era.  And it all started with a fake Mariachi sound recorded in a garage.

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*Alpert's voice was not a great one, and he really never planned on having the record released; it was something of a gift to his wife. But there was such a demand for it that the finally agreed.

**Most people today are familiar with his music through reruns of The Dating Game, which used Tijuana Brass music as its background music for the show.

Cadillac Records

(2008)
Written and Directed by Darnell Martin
Starring Adrian Brody, Jeffrey Wright, Columbus Short, Cedric the Entertainer, Eamonn Walker, Mos Def, Beyonce Knowles, Geneva Wade.
IMDB Entry

I love the blues. I was first introduced to it in college, probably by a roommate who loved the Allman Brothers.*  I started finding other acts (Buddy Guy and Junior Wells played locally, and I loved it) and soon became a major fan.

And if you're  a fan of the blues, it's essential that you see Cadillac Records.

The movie is the story of Murray Chess of Chess Records, a company instrumental in popularizing the blues and making it one of the roots of rock.

Chess (Adrian Brody) is a nightclub owner who want to make records.  He quickly signs Muddy Waters (Jeffrey Wright), who starts making blues hits one after the other.  Chess signs the troubled Little Walter (Columbus Short) and soon hired Willie Dixon (Cedric) to play bass and write the songs. The prickly Howlin' Wolf (Eamonn Walker) soon joins, but Chess gets its greatest success by signing a country singer named Chuck Berry (Mos Def), which creates a crossover sensation.  Later, when Berry goes to jail, Etta James (Beyonce) replaces him as Chess's big act.

These names should be more familiar to everyone; they are all in the Blues Hall of Fame and Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (deservedly so), and their success was due to the fact that Murray Chess was on the lookout for new talent, regardless of race.

The story is pretty much the story of the company under Chess. There's actually not much of a narrative arc, just incidents showing the music being created.  Most are very nicely done.  One of my favorites is this group of grubby English musicians showing up at the studio and immediately recognizing Muddy Waters.  "We named our group after one of your songs," they say.  "Which one?" asks Muddy.  The answer, "Rolling Stone."

There also an indication that Chess, much as he loved the music, was a businessman:  the movie title comes from the fact that he gave his top artists Cadillacs -- taking the money from their royalties, though.

I got the impression that the movie takes some liberties with the actual stories, but that doesn't matter.  It's worthwhile just to show how the roots of rock got started.

The movie got good reviews, but did only s0-so in the box office.  The soundtrack did well, probably on Beyonce's name (though she does a good job as Etta), and there was a small controversy when the real Etta (the only one of the people involved who is still alive right now**) complained about Beyonce appropriating her song. 

If you're interested in the roots of rock, and have a liking for the blues, this is a film to see.

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* I actually had already seen them in concert twice, but they made little impression on me.  But my roommate kept playing their music, including The Allman Brothers Live at Ludlow's Garage (which wasn't released until twenty years later, but he had worked there and had the tape).

**Other than Hubert Sumlin, who shows up in one scene as Howlin' Wolf's guitarist.

S.O.B.

(1981)
Directed by Blake Edwards
Written by Blake Edwards
Starring Richard Mulligan, Julie Andrews, Robert Preston, William Holden, Larry Hagman, Marissa Berenson, Loretta Swit, Robert Vaughn, Shelly Winters.
IMDB Entry

Sometimes a movie become famous for things that are only a sideline of the film.  Shark Attack III: Meglodon, for instance, would have been completely forgotten (and rightly so) if it wasn't for one particular line.*  S.O.B. is generally known -- if at all -- for one little bit of risque trivia. Yet it deserves more: it is one of the bitterest satires about moviemaking ever made.

Blake Edwards doesn't often come to mind as one the world's greatest directors, but he had a long and very successful career.  He's underrated in part because he did mostly comedies, which are often underrated. Edwards started out in TV in the 50s and became a success with Peter Gunn** and moved to movies with such hits at Breakfast at Tiffany's, Days of Wine and Roses, The Pink Panther***, and The Great Race.

Then he hit a slump.  A few so-so films ending up with the fiasco Darling Lili, an attempt to showcase his new bride, Julie Andrews. Edwards and Andrews wanted to show her in a role where she wasn't playing a goody-goody character, but the film went way over budget and flopped badly.

Edwards went into a slump, with several smaller budget flops until he reteamed with Peter Sellers**** for three new and successful Pink Panther sequels, and then became atop the movie heap with the smash hit 10.

And that's when he wrote and directed S.O.B.  The movie is about director Felix Farmer (Richard Mulligan), who after nearly going insane due to the bad reviews and box office for his film Night Wind, decides to reshoot it and add a nude scene for his goody-goody actress wife Sally Miles (Julie Andrews).

Edwards's bitterness over Darling Lili spills over into every scene.  There isn't an admirable character on screen.  Everyone -- including Farmer and Miles -- is conniving, grasping, completely filled with self-interest -- and wickedly funny.

Andrews obviously has fun with the parallel to her screen persona. Sally is sweetness and light on screen, but something of an egotistical prima donna off. Andrews, of course, has never really complained about her Mary Poppins/Maria roles, but has definitely wished that people would see her as something else.

And, of course, her nude scene is what is most noted about the film. Edwards was smart:  its shot as unerotically as possible.  Sally just tears off her top and stands there.  I think that's partially a comment on how people make too big a deal about such things.

The best performance, however, comes from Robert Preston as Dr. Feingarten, a quack who's always ready for the right drugs for any movie star's needs.  Preston's career had its ups and downs.  He was a movie success, but never a star until his definitive Harold Hill in The Music Man both on stage and on the screen. But he never capitalized on it.  Dr. Feingarten is just a great role, they type of character that makes you want to see more and who you find yourself looking forward to his every line.

The film wasn't perfect.  The last half hour adds a new subplot that is slow and not particularly funny. Because of this and some mixed reviews, the film did only fair at the box office.

But by the time the results were in, Edwards was already shooting his next film: Victor/Victoria.  The success of that kept S.O.B. from hurting Edwards's career.  It also made people forget about, it though. It is one of moviedom's greatest and bitterest satires.

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*Known to those who managed to suffer through it as "THE LINE." 

**Where he began his long collaboration with Henry Mancini, who wrote music for many of Edwards's movies.

***Most people may know that the name "Pink Panther" does not refer to Inspector Clouseau, but rather to the jewels that is the movie's McGuffin. But people tend to forget that in the original film, Clouseau was just a supporting character and there are many scenes without him.

****Who was in something of a career slump himself.

Zapped (music)

(1970)
Various Artists

Music success is all about promotion. Every artist and record company has to find ways to get their songs out to a potential audience.  Companies try various ways, but, for a short time, one method was the sampler album.

A sampler was different from a compilation (say, That's What I Call Music). The record company would put out a record* with songs from new upcoming artists and then sell them very cheaply, usually only through mail order. Warner Brothers records did this a lot in the late 60s and early 70s with their Loss Leaders series; whenever you bought an album they'd have a list of samplers that you could pick up for $2 for a double disk (very cheap even then).

At this time, the great Frank Zappa ran not one but two record labels:  Bizarre Records and Straight Records.  Since both labels were distributed by Warner Brothers, a sampler was released.  Zapped was only one disk, and sold for $1 (plus postage, I believe)

The album was a masterpiece of the avant garde of the time.  The 13 songs included**:

• Alice Cooper -- Titanic Overture
• Alice Cooper -- Refrigerator Heaven.  Cooper was known at the time as a group whose members wore dresses (it was still the group name, not the lead singer).  I remember listening to this and being unable to decide if it was a bad song by a good group or a good song by a bad group.
• Captain Beefheart and His Magic Band -- The Blimp (Mousetrapreplica).  Of course, no one ever topped the Captain for avant garde credentials.  This is one of his most famous songs, a gonzo talking blues shout out about the blimp arriving.
• Captain Beefheart and His Magic Band -- The Old Fart at Play.
• Judy Hensky and Jerry Yester -- St. Nicholas Hall.  Yester replaced Zal Yanovsky in the Lovin' Spoonful and later teamed up with his wife Hensky.
• Tim Buckley -- I Must Have Been Blind. He's gained a cult following since; at the time, his music was described as "acid folk."
• Wild Man Fischer -- Merry-Go-Round.  Fischer was a street musician in Los Angeles who'd make up songs for passers by when Zappa found him and recorded him. "Merry-Go-Round" is a strangely infection off-key chant, and his signature song.
• Tim Dawe -- Little Boy Blue.  I don't know much about him, nor do I remember the song all that well.
• Lord Buckley -- Governor Slugwell. Buckley (no relation to Tim) was a groundbreaking comedian and poet, who made his name with some unusual monologues.  This is evidently not a good indication of his work, but the name is well known among professional comics.
• Jeff Simmons --  Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up.  Simmons had played with the Mothers, and this song features some great guitar work by Zappa.
• The Mothers of Invention --  Holiday in Berlin.  Of course.
• The GTOs -- Do Me In Once and I'll Be Sad, Do Me In Twice and I'll Know Better (Circular Circulation).  Another Zappa project.  The name stands for "Girls Together Outrageously," three music groupies based in LA.  The song is actually pretty good, with some top musicians there, willing to help out.
• Frank Zappa -- Willie the Pimp.  From Zappa's Hot Rats LP, with Beefheart on vocals.

It hard to say how well the album sold:  it was cheap, but not sold in stores, and clearly these were not acts that were going to make gold records.  Alice Cooper was the only one to who did.***  Zappa/the Mothers and Captain Beefheart continued on long careers until Zappa's death and Beefheart's decision to give up music for painting.  Tim Buckley died young****; Lord Buckley had died a decade before the album was released.

The LP is now very hard to find (except, of course on eBay, where it's pretty inexpensive).  There was no effort to convert it to CD.  Indeed, I'll bet many of the artists here are just not available any more. But it's a great look at how record companies back in the day were willing to sign acts on talent as much as their commercial potential.

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*These predated CDs by a decade.

**There were actually two slightly different versions of the record, with some different songs.  The second version replaces "Refrigerator Heaven" with "Reflected'; "St. Nicholas Hall" with "Horses on a Stick"; "Governor Slugwell" with "The Train"; and "Holiday in Berlin" with "Valerie."

*** I remember being astonished hearing "I'm Eighteen" making the charts; I never expected them to be that popular.

****His son, Jeff Buckley, was also a musician, responsible for making Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" ubiquitous. He also died young.

The Tin Men (book)

(1965)
by Michael Frayn

It's always fun to discover a new author.  It's even better when that author goes on to bigger and better things.  For me, one of those authors was Michael Frayn.

I came across The Tin Men when it first came out.  Frayn had been a newspaper columnist when he started writing novels, and The Tin Men is a memorable debut.

It's a story about the denizens of the William Morris Institute of Automation Research, a British think tank trying to develop robots and filled with bizarre characters and schemes.

For instance, Macintosh is trying to create robots with a moral sense. He figured the simplest solution was to put the robot on a sinking raft with something or someone else and set up its programming so it will sacrifice itself to save another.  It wasn't easy: at first the robot would throw itself overboard no matter what was on the raft.  Then he programmed it to sacrifice itself only for an organism more intelligent than itself.  So if there were a person, it would calculate the size of the person's brain.

Goldwasser was inventing newspaper headlines that were completely meaningless, but which everyone recognizes ("Strike Threat Probe"). Everyone had their own mania, and when it's announced that the Queen will be visiting, all sorts of madness erupts.

But, for me, the best sections describe Hugh Rowe, who wants to be a novelist.  He tries through unconventional methods.  For instance, he writes the reviews first, hoping to see what the book is about.  When he gets down to writing, he spends the first chapter describing characters down to the finest, most ridiculous detail ("There were four finger and a thumb on each hand") and worrying about the details he left out (the number of buttons on the man's shirt, the size of his shoes, etc.).

The next of Rowe's chapters is a hilarious psychological mishmash ("Anna plainly knew that Nunopolis understood her feelings about Fiddlingchild, and she knew too that Nina knew she knew about Nunopolis's knowledge.")  The third chapter is a breezy slangy bit of jazz-tinged gibberish that finally has Rowe giving up the writing altogether.

Yet there is a moment in the novel where Rowe is asked to describe what he wants to write.  Frayn describes a very evocative scene, but when Rowe tries to talk about it, he cannot make it work like it did in his mind, and the questions by the person asking about it make the whole thing seem trivial.  That is, in many ways, the dilemma of every writer:  translating what's in your mind onto the page, and Frayn encapsulates it quite accurately.

The book did OK (though better in the UK than in the US), and Frayn went on to bigger things.  He switched to writing plays.  Noises Off was a big success, and he eventually won all sorts of Best Play awards for Copenhagen.

But even from the beginning, you could see he would be a big talent.  The Tin Men is a very funny book with some interesting depth to it. I can't say that you could see the writer who wrote Copenhagen, but there are certainly signs that Frayn could go on to something much bigger.

Cat Mother and the All-Night Newsboys (music)

(1969-1973)
Personnel:  Larry Parker (guitar/vocals), Roy Michaels (bass), Bob Smith (Keyboards), Michael Equine (drums).  (Later added Paul Johnson (guitar), Jan Ungar (bass, violin)).
All Music Guide

Cat Mother and the All-Night Newsboys might make the list of one-hit wonders, and most histories concentrated on that hit.  But if you listened to FM radio in the early 70s, it was another one of their songs that you'll remember with a smile on your face.

The group started in New York, playing clubs and signing a record contract. They got their friend Jimi Hendrix to produce their first album, which gave them their hit "Good Old Rock 'n Roll."  Hendrix even hired them as his opening act.

"Good Old Rock 'n Roll" was about the rock that the band grew up with, and actually used quotes from several well-know songs, more of a medley than a song. There was a verse in the beginning, which then segued into "Sweet Little Sixteen," "Long Tall Sally," "Chantilly Lace," "Whole Lotta Shakin' Going On," "Blue Suede Shoes," and "Party Doll" before returning to the original tune.

 

This was actually quite new to many listeners of the time.  If you missed the 50s, you didn't often have the chance to hear these songs (oldies stations were just getting started). I'm sure many of those who bought the song had never heard the originals before.

But the hit only went to #25 and there was turmoil and turnover.  Charlie Chin left the band, and was replaced by Jan Unger and Paul Johnson, who recorded their second album, Albion Doo-wha.

It didn't do well, but it spawned one of the great FM radio tracks: Jay Unger's "Strike a Match and Light Another":

In the first days of this country when the buffalo roamed the land,
All the saddle tramps and cowboys used to roll their own by hand.
Well they'd swing up to the saddle on their ass or on their horse
And recite a little ditty that went like this of course.

When your feet are in the stirrups and your ass is on the ground
Cause the grass that you's been eating is the finest stuff around
Well let us not remember boys and let us not forget
Strike a match and light another marijuana cigarette.

Yes, a song about the joys of marijuana.  This was sung to a cheerful tune that was just plain goofy, with some non sequitur lyrics and a great deal of wit. It was really impossible to listen to without smiling, even if you weren't stoned.  And the free use of the word "ass" was also a plus in a time when it was banned from the radio.  Perfectly legitimate here, of course, since it was talking about a donkey.  (Right.)

But the song wasn't enough.  The group struggled on for a few more years before calling it quits and have pretty much been forgotten.

Except for one.  Jay Unger went off on his own tangent writing folk-influenced music. One piece, "Ashokan Farewell" was picked by filmmaker Ken Burns to be included in his epic documentary, The Civil War.  It was played throughout the miniseries (25 times, according to Wikipedia) and became the theme song for it.  Many people even think it was an actual Civil War era song.  I must say I was delighted to realize the song was by the same person who wrote "Strike a match."

The group's albums are hard to find, of course.  I'm not sure if they even made it to CD.  But they were a tiny but memorable piece of rock history.

Bored of the Rings (Book)

(1969)
by Henry Beard and Doug Kenney
Wikipedia Entry

I first discovered Lord of the Rings when I found a hardcover copy of The Fellowship of the Ring in the library.  I liked science fiction and fantasy and thought this was just my thing. I took it home, got seriously bored about the time they were traipsing around with Tom Bombazine, and took it back.  It was the first book I ever started reading without finishing.

A few years later, some friends of mine were discussing Bored of the Rings.  It sounded pretty damn funny, but they told me I'd miss most of the jokes if I hadn't read Tolkien.  A friend gave me The Fellowship again, and I bought the rest of the trilogy and started slogging through it*.  But, to reward myself, I also bought a copy of Bored of the Rings and kept it wrapped up in a stapled paper bag until I was finished.

It was worth it.

Bored of the Rings is one of the greatest book-length parodies ever written.  Authors Henry Beard and Doug Kenney wrote it at Harvard, where they were editors of The Harvard Lampoon.  The character names, for instance, are all tradmarks:  Goodgulf, Frito, Spam, Pepsi and Moxie, etc.** The book summarized the plot of the trilogy, of course, with some really off-the-wall humor.  Say, for instance the prophecy about Bromosel was the immortal poem:

Five nine is your height and 180's your weight.
You cash in your chips about page 88.***

The book was silly, quite suggestive, and funny from start to finish.  And,yes, it helped to have read the trilogy.

Authors Henry Beard and Doug Kenney went on to further triumphs, forming the original National Lampoon.  Later, Kinney helped write Animal House.

If you love the trilogy, and don't mind laughing about it, try to track down a copy.

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*I liked it better this time.  I had already tried and liked The Hobbit, so I also held out that the trilogy would be as good as that.  It wasn't overall, but it's a book I respect, even if I don't love it.

**I didn't get the joke of the name Dildo Bugger at the time.  Life in the 60s was much more innocent.

***And they later had him looking nervously at the top of the page to check the number.

Men with Guns

(1997)
Written and Directed by John Sayles
Starring Fredrico Luppi, Damien Delgado, Damián Alcázar, Dan Rivera Gonzalez, Tania Cruz.
IMDB Entry

I live in Schenectady, NY. And Schenectady's biggest contribution to movies is John Sayles.

Sayles is one of the top independent filmmakers.  He started as a writer, and began working with Roger Corman on Piranha and Battle Beyond the Stars. He also wrote and directed his first independent feature about this time with Return of the Secaucus Seven, sort of a template for The Big Chill. He continued with many indie successes in 80s and 90s.

Sayles never looked to be popular.  So when he had his a moderate success with Lone Star -- probably enough to go Hollywood -- he followed it up with as un-Hollywood a film as could be made:  Men with Guns.

The film is set in an unnamed Latin American country.  After the death of his wife, Dr. Humberto Fuentes (Fredrico Luppi) goes into a remote village to search for some former students who are reported lost.  As he travels, he meets with other along the way through the war-torn countryside, showing things to the doctor that he never imagined in his comfortable life. The title refers to the facts of life in the countryside:  men with guns come and order people around.

Sayles went far off the beaten path for this. First of all, the movie was shot in Spanish, with actors unknown to US audiences (other than a small role for Mandy Patankin, probably to get funding).  And he suffered the consequences:  poor box office, of course.  Despite some very good reviews, there was little interest in the US in a foreign language film by an American director.

Sayles, of course, isn't interested in making blockbusters.  He continues to work, scraping up money writing screenplays and occasionally acting, as he finances some of the best independent films you'll ever see.

But the result is stunning.  The ending especially is a very surprising twist, and Sayles leads you to it perfectly.

Important Note: There is a second Men with Guns -- a routine ultraviolent gangster shootup film.  Don't be confused.

Space Angel (TV)

(1962-64)
Produced by Cambria Productions
Created by Dick Darley
Voice actors:  Ned Lefebvre, Margaret Kerry, Hal Smith
Wikipedia Page

If you've ever seen it, one of the most memorably bizarre animation techniques in early TV (or ever) was Syncho-Vox.  Cambria Productions invented the technique because it was a cutting edge way to ... oh, hell -- they did it because it was cheap.  It's expensive to animate lip movements, so Cambria came up with the next best thing:  live action lips superimposed over a cartoon face. To save even more money, many scenes hid the characters mouths completely.

The effect was bizarre. Not only were the lips coated with dark lipstick to make it stand out, but the actors spoke with exaggerated lip movements so the audience could see the technique.  Of course, the name most closely associated with this was Clutch Cargo. It was a big enough success to spawn Space Angel.

Space Angel was a code name of Scott McCloud, a square-jawed and eyepatched astronaut and investigator for the Earth Bureau of Investigation.  With his crew Crystal and Taurus**, they faced threats throughout the solar system.

The science fiction angle caught my attention, of course, but the show also looked better than most cartoons of the time.  Oh, the animation was lousy and the Synchro-Vox just plain weird, but the drawings had a look to them unlike anything else.  And for good reason.  The show was an early assignment for Alex Toth.  Toth was very important both in comics and animation, and his designs for the show really stood out.

The plots were standard science fiction, with each adventure running five minutes a day for five days.  Stations would run it Monday through Friday on their kid's shows; the Friday show would resolve the story. 

The show ran for a couple of years before moving on. To a budding science fiction fan like me, it will always be a fond memory.

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*With his pals Spinner and Paddlefoot.

** Whose accent is quite reminiscent  of Scotty's from Star Trek.

Fink Along With MAD (music)

(1962)
Sung by The Dellwoods, Mike Russo, Jeanne Hayes, and Alfred E. Neumann

MAD Magazine was a revolution when it came along.  The story is well known -- William M. Gaines, publisher of horror comics, decided to produce a comic that was, well, comic.  His first two editors, Harvey  Kurtzman (whose importance to the magazine was overstated) and Al Feldstein (whose importance is often overlooked), created a juggernaut of low brow bust-a-gut humor. 

It was wildly successful.  And MAD succeeded just about everywhere.* Reprints of the magazine were made into books. There was a successful off-Broadway show (The MAD Show).**  They made their mark on the legal system with a Supreme Court ruling that allowed people to write comedy lyrics to popular songs.

And, of course, they did music.  Fink Along With MAD is one result***.

The first single from it was massively popular, even if it never made the charts.  MAD would repackage their best articles into "Annuals." And, in order to get people to buy materials that they probably had already read, they would throw in special features.  For The Worst of MAD #9, they included a flexi-disk**** of "It's a Gas," billed as "Alfred E. Neuman vocalizes!"

The song was a  peppy tune.  After each musical phrase, the band would stop and you'd hear a burp.*****  For Mad's audience, that was hilarious.******

So Mad also released an album:  Fink Along With Mad.

The title is a reference to the Sing Along with Mitch albums of the period and was filled with classic Mad humor. Mad had a very odd way of looking at teenagers that probably wasn't ever true, but which they constantly used for jokes.

There are twelve songs on the record:

• Let's do the Fink - Actually, a pretty odd song, reminiscent in theme to Tom Lehrer's "Masochism Tango."
• I'll Never Make Fun of Her Moustache Again. -- self-explanatory
• The Biggest Mouth in Town - About a girl in love with a guy who blabs about everything they do.  It actually taught me not to so anything like this.
• Her Dad's Got Money cha-cha-cha -- the basis of true love (see "First I Look at the Purse")
• I accidentally messed up his hair -- tragedy, sung in an "It's My Party and I'll Cry If I Want To" manner.
• It's a Gas 
• Don't Put Onions on your Hamburger -- which leads to obvious problems.
• Loving a Siamese Twin - far less kinky that it would be today
• She Lets Me Watch her Mom and Pop Fight -- a bit disturbing; he thinks it's more fun than sex.
• When the Braces on our Teeth Lock -- For some reason, this scenario was an obsession of the magazine.  Has it ever happened in real life?
• Contact Lenses
• The Neighborhood Draft Board - - Less controversial than it would have been a few years later, but a concern for older male teens of the time
• A Mad Extra -  starts out with the song "She Got a Nose Job," but the record scratches in the middle.

The concerns are dated, though in a charming way, since the record assumes that all that dating teens did was a little bit of necking and going further than heavy kissing was unthinkable.

The album didn't seem to be particularly successful.  Probably any real teen would have found the jokes more about dating ten years earlier.  But the tunes were catchy fifties rock 'n roll and doo-wop, and the lyrics are pretty funny if you're willing to accept the basis for the humor.

This was the last stand alone album MAD did (there were soundtracks for The MAD Show and MAD Presents Up the Academy******).  I have no idea what happened to the vocalists on the disk (other than Neumann); they were probably hired for the occasion and have long since left the music industry.

Of course, MAD started declining a bit in the 70s, when it was eclipsed by The National Lampoon. It's still going strong, but seems a bit formulaic, and I find it sad that I usually enjoy Cracked (MAD's second-rate competitor for many years*******) online more than anything I've read in MAD in years.

Society has changed, of course, but Fink Along with MAD is still a very funny album.

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*A good thing for Gaines, whose horror titles were killed by the anti-comic hysteria of the mid-50s.

**The cast included Linda Lavin, Paul Sand, Richard Libertini, and Jo Anne Worley.

***There were a couple of earlier records:  Musically MAD and MAD "Twists" Rock 'n Roll.

***A record on thin plastic. This was a common giveaway of the time -- I've seen them on the back of cereal boxes, for instance.  Usually, they were square instead of round, since that was easier to make.

****If the record were done today, it would include farts instead. What this says about changes in humor over the past 40 years I don't want to know.

*****Our gym teacher once played it as we did calisthenics.  One more my more memorable school workouts.

******An attempt to put the Mad brand on an Animal House type movie. It flopped and MAD savaged it and later paid to have their name removed from it, though that's been restored and has developed some cult interest.  Though it seems every movie has developed a cult.

*******Remember Sylvester P. Smythe?  (I promise, no more footnotes after this.

The Endless Summer

(1966)
Written and Directed by Bruce Brown
Starring Micheal Hynson, Robert August, Bruce Brown
IMDB Entry
Bruce Brown Films

Lots of great directors had themes running through their work.  There's Hitchcock's "innocent man on the run" or Orson Welles's "lives of larger-than-life figures."  Bruce Brown had more than just a theme: he had an obsession.

Surfing!!!!!!*

Brown directed surf documentaries. Or, rather, he showed up with his camera, edited them, added narration, and made films of the whole experience. He loved the sport.

The Endless Summer was his big splash.  The idea is simple:  Mike and Robert go on a trip around the world looking for the perfect wave, visiting Senegal, Ghana, Nigeria, South Africa, Australia, New Zealand, Tahiti, Hawaii and California.  Brown filmed their trip, their disappointments, and finally their triumph. 

Of course, it shows a lot of surfing, but the footage is well chosen and never becomes dull. If the waves are no good, then there were other things to shoot.  In a way, he was a precursor to modern "follow someone around" documentaries, since he tended to keep the camera running to see what might happen.

The film is especially entertaining due to Brown's narration.  He has a nice ironic sense of humor and isn't afraid to laugh at some of the quirks of the sport.  The line "You guys really missed it.  You should have been here yesterday" shows up a lot, and always brings a smile.

The film was a big success. Brown's earlier films shows only in surfing hotbeds, but this broke through to the general public.  People who knew nothing about the sport showed up, and some even took it up.  As much as anything, it contributed to the rise of surfing over the years and the movie poster, in various forms, has become an icon.

Brown made other surfing films, and his sequel The Endless Summer II, did even better than the first. Now, however, the movie is like it was in the beginning -- known to surfers, but not the world in general.**

It's a perfect film to recall how special the summer can be -- whether you're a surfer or not.

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*To get the full Bruce Brown treatment, say the word in an excited falsetto.

**This despite the fact it's been selected for the Library of Congress's film registry, an astute choice.

Microbe Hunters (book)

(1926)
by Paul De Kruif
Amazon.com

Microbe Hunters probably started more people on careers as doctors than any other. It was a massive bestseller over the years (and is still in print), and everyone who has ever read it remembers it with great pleasure.

De Kruif grew up in Michigan and got his doctorate in microbiology, but, after trying teaching, he became a writer.  His second book was Microbe Hunters, and it made him a household word.

The book is a history of the early development of our knowledge about germs and bacteria.  He chooses a dozen early scientists and tells their story.  They are (using his own chapter headings)*:

• Anton van Leeuwenhoek: the first of the Microbe Hunter
• Lazzaro Spallanzani: Microbes must have parents!
• Louis Pasteur: Microbes are a menace!
• Robert Koch : The Death Fighter (identifying pathogens, notably anthrax)
• Pasteur (again): And the Mad Dog (rabies)
• Emile Roux and Emil von Behring:  Massacre the Guinea Pigs (diphtheria)
• Elie Metchnikoff : The Nice Phagocytes
• Theobald Smith: Ticks and Texas Fever
• David Bruce: Trail of the Tsetse (Sleeping sickness)
• Ronald Ross vs. Battista Grassi: Malaria
• Walter Reed**: In the Interests of Science -- and for Humanity! (Yellow Fever)
• Paul Ehrlich: The Magic Bullet (Syphilis)

As you can see, DeKruf had a way of making all these seem like the epic battles they were.  His prose style was delightfully gushy, and it worked wonderfully in making you feel the difficulties in unraveling these mysteries.  He makes up conversations, adds his own comments, and makes it all an exciting read that you really can't put down. It reads like a novel, and you get a strong idea of how the people involved slowly learned the cause of the diseases they studied.  It's still entertaining reading today.

Some modern critics have complained about this practice, saying that making up conversations and character motivations gets away from the truth.  I disagree. They are confusing accuracy with the truth; the book may not be 100% accurate, but it is 100% truthful.

De Kruif followed this up with the lesser-known Hunger Fighters, which is nearly as good.  He continued to write about science and scientists until the early 60s.

If you like science, mysteries, or just plain good, inspiring stories, this is one of the best.

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*My notes are in parentheses.

**In case you wondered why they named that Hospital in Washington DC for him.

Roger Ramjet (TV)

(1965-??)
Produced by Fred Crippen
Written by Gene Moss, Jim Thurman
Voices by Gary Owens, Dave Ketchum, Dick Beals, Gene Moss, Joanie Gerber, Bob Arbogast
Toontracker Page.

It's hard to find a 60s kid's TV show that can't be aired in the 21st century (at least, not for children). By the time TV came along, the out-and-out racism of early cartoons was seen for what it was and didn't get into the shows.  But Roger Ramjet probably couldn't be shown as a kid's show today.

Which is a shame.  The cartoon was very similar in tone to greats like Rocky and Bullwinkle and Beany and Cecil. 

It really wasn't a show. Roger Ramjet was marketed as very short episodes, about six minutes long* -- including about two minutes of opening and closing credit -- designed to be shown on local TV shows.  Your local Colonel Clown Show** would buy the episodes and run them during their show.  Times, obviously, varied from market to market, and often they'd move around within the show. So unless you spent a lot of time watching Colonel Clown or your local equivalent, you had a hard time following Roger.

But when you caught it, the show was a delight.  Roger (voice of Gary Owens) was your standard big, dumb lug superhero, who took a proton pill, which gave him the power of twenty atom bombs for a period of twenty seconds.*** With his American Eagle squadron of Yank, Doodle, Dan, and Dee, (three boys and a girl) he fought threats to our country, taking the pill at the end to save the day.

Like Rocky and Bullwinkle and Beany and Cecil, the show was packed with jokes for adults and references to political and social events. Anything was fair game.   In addition, the cartoon was incredibly fast paced, fitting in all the action and jokes in a small space.  It also had the same cheap animation of Bullwinkle, which makes it even more endearing.

Most memorable, of course was the show's theme song. Evidently, they couldn't afford to pay a composer for the music, so they just used "Yankee Doodle" with new lyrics:

Roger Ramjet, he's our man
Hero of our nation
For his adventures just be sure
And stay tuned to this station.

As for the talent, Gary Owens gained fame a few years afterwards as the announcer for Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In.  But Dave Ketchum -- the voice of the narrator -- has also be very successful (if more low-key).  He starred in Camp Runamuck -- a universally despised sitcom -- but is more memorable as Agent 13 in Get Smart, who always was hiding away in ridiculous places, like a mailbox or in the walls.

About 120 episodes were made, and they remained syndicated wherever TV stations still ran kiddie show.  However, the theme of the show probably led to its dying off. With the War on Drugs, a children's show that has someone taking a pill to get super powers is bound to stir up more controversy than a 40-year-old cartoon is worth. It shows up from time to time, but not where it can be mistaken for a children's show.

Which, of course, it wasn't. That's part of the fun.

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*Including about two minutes of opening and closing credits.  I always wished they'd cut out some of the credits to get more story in.

**An actual show out of New Britain, CT.  Sources say he was originally "Happy the Clown," but I remember it as "Captain Clown."  In any case, he became the Colonel, a change that seemed so arbitrary to my ten-year-old mind that I surmised someone had told him he couldn't use the original name.  Turns out, I was right.  In any case, I don't think they ran Roger.

*** It's amazing what phrases stick in your mind.

Zotz (candy)

It's a candy!  It's a practical joke!  It's both -- It's Zotz.

I don't think Zotz were ever all that popular; they were more of a novelty than serious candy.  But there was (and still is) no candy like them.

Zotz were basically fruit-flavored hard candy: good, but not out of the ordinary -- until you got to the center.

I first discovered them in college.  One of the other guys in the dorm had me try one.  It was early on in the joke, so they didn't think to give me one vital instruction: bite down on it.  I didn't react the way they hoped, but they later realized the issue.

You see, the center of the Zotz was baking soda.*  This doesn't sound like a particularly good ingredient for candy, but, as your high school science teacher showed you, when you mix baking soda with an acid (in this case, probably citric acid), everything fizzes.**

Which is what Zotz did.  One bite, and your mouth filled with fizziness. It was a lot of fun, even if you were in on the joke.  And I got to enjoy them a lot.

The candy seemed to have originated in Italy.  The name may have come from a book (and movie) about a professor who finds an ancient coin which gives him special powers: if he points at someone, they feel pain; if he says "zotz," they move in slow motion; and if he points and says "zotz!", they die.  It was a comedy.

In any case, Zotz still can be purchased online.  Just search for "Zotz candy" and you'll find it.  It's worth a try, just for fun.

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* Perhaps it was baking powder, only I remember seeing "sodium bicarbonate" on the ingredients label.  Zotz called it "fizz powder," but no one was fooled.

** Usually.  If there was a crack in the candy, the powder leaked out and you got a sensation that some sort of liquid center was in the middle.

The Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill

(2005)
Directed by Judy Irving
Featuring Mark Bittner
IMDB Entry

In 2005, audiences were treated to an amazing documentary about a group of birds in a hostile environment and how they lived, survived, and thrived.  It was ultimately, a movie about love.  And it wasn't March of the Penguins.

The Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill documents an unnatural phenomenon.  On Telegraph Hill in San Francisco, there is a large flock of wild parrots. How they got there is a mystery. Some believe they escaped from pet shops; others that their owners let them loose when they tired of them; others that they came aboard a ship fromthe tropics.  The answer may be a combination of the three.

Judy Irving decided to make a film about the flock of parrots, and about Mark Bittner, the man who took it upon himself to look after the birds.

Bittner is a hippie type who, from his apartment, not only fed the birds, but looked after them, giving them names and providing care when they're sick. He fought for them when a builder wanted to take down a tree they nested in. He is a man who dedicated his life to the birds, even writing a book about the parrots.

But two things really set this movie apart. The first ties into his naming the birds. Each of the birds has a personality; they become characters. Most notable is Connor, who is a different species than the rest of the flock, but who hangs with them like an unwanted younger brother, perhaps in hope as finding a mate. He is absolutely unforgettable.

The second thing is the ending. You don't get many twist endings in documentaries, but as you watch the final scene, you discover something else that is the perfect plot twist and which lets you out of the theater with a great feeling.

The film started out in the film festival route before gaining wide release in 2005.  Bittner is still caring for the parrots, who have now become something of a tourist attraction in San Francisco. And the film deserves to be ranked with the best documentaries ever made.

You can have your penguins.

Henry Kuttner & C. L. Moore (authors)

Kuttner: (1915-1958)/ Moore: (1911-1987)

Modern science fiction started out as a short story medium. Sure there were novels, but many were just "fix-ups" of multiple stories (like Asimov's Foundation) or expansions of published stories. And back in the early days, you could make a living writing short stories for science fiction magazines, with an occasional fix-up or novel.

Henry Kuttner and C. L. Moore came out of that milieu.  He was one of the top writers of his time, and  helped stake out the horror genre after H. P. Lovecraft died.  She was a pioneer for women writers in the genre.

Even the thing that usually gets an author noticed -- making a movie of his work -- didn't help.  Despite the fact that at least five of their stories were made into movies or TV episodes, it didn't help, partly because Hollywood never did them justice.

Kuttner grew up in Los Angeles, and started writing pulp science fiction and horror in the late 1930s. He became a major fan of H. P. Lovecraft and corresponded with Lovecraft as he wrote his own horror stories. It was through this correspondence that he met C. L. Moore.

Catherine Lucille Moore had started writing horror and weird tales a few years before Kuttner.  Her "Northwest Smith" adventures were a big hit, after she had decided to use just initial in her byline so people wouldn't think she was female.* It worked pretty well, since Kuttner first thought she was male. He evidently was quickly disabused of that notion, since they married in 1940.

The two were collaborators. The not only edited each other's stories, but they also wrote them together -- one writing a section and leaving it on the typewriter for the other to add to.  Often they were never sure which person was responsible for what.

So it's hard to put a finger on Kuttner and Moore after their marriage, since a story bylined "Kuttner" would have some Moore in it and vice versa. In addition, they wrote under various pen names, most notably Lewis Padgett and Lawrence O'Donnell.  But the general belief was that Kuttner's stories were more "pulpy" whereas Moore was more "literary."

Kuttner wrote several novels, but none of any particular note. He was best known for his short works, and his most successful series was his Gallagher stories, about an inventor who came up with all sorts of strange devices -- but only when he was blind drunk. In the morning, he couldn't remember what they were for. I don't think these hold up all that well, even if you were willing to accept the un-PC-ness of the concept.

Moore wrote the Northwest Smith** series and another featuring Jiriel of Jory, one of the earliest sword and sorcery series with a female protagonist.

But their best stories -- collaborations to one degree or another -- were classics.  Some of these are:

• The Twonky.  This story scared the hell out of me, and rereading it today, it has a chilling subtext. A man gets what looks like a TV, but which is an artifact from the future with some sinister features. It was made into a movie, which evidently didn't do it justice.
• Vintage Season where a man discovers that the people showing up in his hotel are time travelers with sinister intentions.
• Mimsy Were the Borogoves. Similar in theme to "The Twonky," it's also about artifacts from the future and their effect on children. The title is from Jaberwocky, of course, and there's a tie-in with Lewis Carroll, but the ending is also pretty damn scary. This also was made into a movie -- The Last Mimzy-- which took the concept and turned it into a feel good fantasy.  Pleasant enough, but the change is a desecration.
• Nothing but Gingerbread Left.  A story about a secret weapon against the Nazis. It's similar in concept as the Monty Python "Most Dangerous Joke in the World" skit.  Python probably didn't know of the story, and they're funnier, but it's interesting to see something similar.
• The Iron Standard.  Astronauts land on a planet and discover that gold and precious gems are worthless, but iron -- which they don't have -- is prized.  Clever way it turns economics on its head.
• Housing Problem. A family of "fairy folk" move into a house, and pay their rent in good luck. But the homeowner gets too curious . . .
• What You Need.  A "mysterious shop" story with a nice twist, good enough to be made into an episode of The Twlight Zone.
• Absolom.  More horror, about a scary child.

It's hard to say which story goes to which author.  Most critics agree that "Vintage Season" was primarily Moore and I get the impression that the humorous works were primarily Kuttner. But if they can't keep it straight, how can anyone?

Kuttner died in 1958 of a heart attack.  Moore pretty much gave up writing short fiction after his death, teaching creative writing courses and also writing for TV.

Now, both authors are pretty much forgotten, and the science fiction short story is in bad shape.  But they were important pioneers in the field and helped shape science fiction, fantasy, and horror into what it is today.

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*Who, after all, were too delicate and frail to write good pulp fiction, of course.  ;)

**Moore once said the name came from seeing "N.W. Smith" listed as a name.

Beany and Cecil (TV)

(1949-1955, 1959-1967)
Created by Bob Clampett
Toontracker

One of the most charming things about 1950s TV was its children's programming. Maybe it was the innocence of the time,* but it produced kid's shows that favored humor over violence and puns over putdowns.  Bad guys were never truly bad and good guys were always truly good.

And there was a fascination with puppets.  Nowadays, Howdy Doody is still remembered, but there was also Kukla, Fran, and Ollie, and puppeteers and ventriloquists like Shari Lewis and Paul Winchell were all very popular.*

Beany and Cecil were one of the first, starting broadcasting in 1949, and also one of the most long lived, simply because they switched to cartoon form when puppets became passe.

The characters were -- as the theme song kept singing -- created by Bob Clampett. Watching it as a kid, I had no idea who Clampett was, and wondered why it mattered.  But later, I learned why.  Clampett, along with Chuck Jones and Friz Freleng, was one of the "big three" cartoon directors at Warner Brothers.  Clampett was responsible for such classics as Porky in Wackyland, A Corny Concerto, Horton Hatches the Egg, Coal Black and de Sebben Dwarfs***, The Bashful Buzzard, and The Great Piggy Bank Robbery.  Clampett left Warners (or was fired; accounts vary) in 1946 and when TV came along, he jumped right in.

The original show with puppets was Time for Beany, and was a smash at the time.  The basic cast was set:

• Beany, a smart kid who wore a helicopter beany hat.
• Cecil the Seasick Sea Ser-Pent (as it was introduced).
• Captain Horatio Huffenpuff of the Leakin' Lena, Beany's uncle.
• Dishonest John, the villain (of course), dressed in black and with a long black mustache.  His catchphrase was a villain's "Nyah-ah-ah" laugh.

Beany and the Captain went on adventures, usually running into some scheme by Dishonest John.  Cecil -- your typical big, dumb lug -- would get fooled, of course, but, in the end, he'd save the day, crying out "I'm coming Beanyboy!" as he swam to the rescue.

The show was surprisingly sophisticated. There were topical and political references in among the bad puns.  Like many good children's entertainment, the writers were writing for themselves, not kids, and the humor shows it.

 

In many ways, the show was much like another great -- but not forgotten -- cartoon of this vintage:  Rocky and Bullwinkle.You can even see some similarities in characterizations (Beany = Rocky, Cecil = Bullwinkle, Dishonest John = Boris Badenov).  Rocky and Bullwinkle is overall better, but it owes a lot to the original.

The show also was notable by the use of the voice talents of Daws Butler and Stan Freberg.

By 1955, puppets had lost their appeal, and Time for Beany ended.  But Clampett was able to use his cartoon background to move on to the next thing in kid's shows.  In 1959, he created a half hour version of Time for Beany called simply Beany and Cecil (with different voice actors).

This is the version I remember, as part of Mattel's Funday Funnies. Clampett was hindered by bad animation, but the show kept the same sharp humor that would surprise you (like Cecil calling a bird a "Robin Redvest," and turning to the camera to say, "I'm too young to say 'redchest.'")****  I also remember Cecil singing "Ragmop" whenever he was in a good mood.

The show ran throughout the 60s, rerunning the same few episodes. It has been tremendously influential in almost the same way Rocky and Bullwinkle was; word has it that Albert Einstein was a big fan of the original puppet version. But, eventually, humorous cartoons vanished from broadcast, and Beany and Cecil vanished.

It hasn't gotten the attention of other cartoons, but was one of the bright spots of kid's TV.

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*It helped that they were cheap.  Actors could play two roles at once, and you can create any set you want with just sets could be created with

**A cliche, I know, at a time when people were seriously worried about Nuclear War.

*** Not easy to find, because of how it portrays Black characters.

**** And, obviously, the censors wouldn't let him say "Robin Redbreast," either.

The Iron Dream (book)

 By Norman Spinrad
(1972)

I'm a big fan of metafiction -- fiction about fiction.  I'm also like a good alternate history novel. The Iron Dream is one of my favorites in that genre because it's a novel written in an alternate world.

When you pick up the book, the title page does indeed say The Iron Dream.  Then you turn the page and discover it's a completely different novel: The Hugo Award winning Lord of the Swastika, written by Adolph Hitler.

The biography in the front tells the tale:  after dabbling in radical politics, Hitler emigrated to the United States, got employment as an illustrator of science fiction books, and eventually started writing novels.  The Lord of the Swastika is considered his masterpiece.

The concept is breathtaking. When you read it, you realize that the book parallels the rise of the Nazis, only as the sort of wish fulfillment fantasy. In it, Ferec Jaggar becomes the leader of a movement to rid the country of Helder from mutant traitors and evil mind controllers so that the pure humans can regain their birthright.

The book is poorly written -- deliberately so, since Hitler learned English late in life -- and shows how Jaggar ultimately triumphs. If you know German history of the period, it's fun to see the parallels, and also the bizarre way that Nazism is translated into the science fiction (and Sword and Sorcery) genre).

The kicker is the "Afterward to the Second Edition," where Professor Homer Whipple of NYU discusses the book and its influence.  It's partly there so that even the dimmest of people will catch on to what Spinrad is trying to do, but it also shows a vision of a world without Nazism -- which has its own set of problems.  The book also disturbingly shows how close this sort of heroic adventure comes to the tenants of the Nazis.

Norman Spinrad has always been one of the bad boys of science fiction, writing about subjects that other writers won't touch and in The Iron Dream he certainly does that in spades.  The book did get critical raves when it came out* and even ended up winning the Prix Tour-Apollo Award for best SF novel in France, but has faded from the list of great SF novels.  It has been reprinted fairly consistently, but I suspect a lot of people might look at it and not understand what's going on.

Once you get used to the purple prose, it's a lot of fun to read, and it makes some very good philosophical points to ponder.

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*Not counting the hilarious fake raves from Michael Moorcock ("...bound to earn Hitler the credit he so richly deserves"), Philip Jose Farmer , Harlan Ellison ("The stunned reader can only gasp in wonder"), and Harry Harrison on the back cover.

The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill but Came Down a Mountain

(1995)
Directed by Christopher Monger
Written by Ivor Monger and Christopher Monger
Starring Hugh Grant, Tara Fitzgerald, Colm Meany, Ian McNeice
IMDB Entry

I have a weakness for quirky British comedies that show a group of oddball characters dealing with a situation, often featuring Irish settings. The Englishman . . . * fits right in, though it’s set in Wales.

The story is set in 1917 in the fictional town of Ffynnon Garw**, just across the border from England, and renowned for being the site of “The First Mountain in Wales.” A team of surveyors George Gerard (Ian McNiece) and Reginald Anson (Hugh Grant) show up to survey the mountain, and discover a horrifying fact: the mountain’s actual altitude was only 984 feet, 16 feet too short to be considered a mountain. It is officially a hill, so the village’s claim to fame is suddenly destroyed. Worse, without a mountain, they might as well be English.

In response, the villagers, led by Morgan the Goat (Colm Meany) contrive to keep the surveyors in town until things can be set right. And, of course, a romance develops between Anson and Betty from Cardiff (Tara Fitzgerald) that complicates matters for everyone.

You can probably guess what happens from the title alone, but the story isn’t about plot twists. It’s about the community. For instance, as the narrator says in the beginning, “there is an extraordinary shortage of last names in Wales. Almost everyone seems to be a Williams, a Jones, or an Evans. To avoid widespread confusion, Welsh people often add an occupation to a name. For example, there was Williams the Petroleum, and Williams the Death. There was Jones the Bottle, and Jones the Prize Cabbage... which described his hobby and his personality. Evans the Bacon, and Evans the End of the World.” There’s also plenty of small humor in the characters’ reactions and skewed perception of the world.

The film came out fairly early in Hugh Grant’s career, his next major role after Four Weddings and a Funeral. He was still playing the charming yet bumbling and shy character that was his trademark, and is just right here.

I’ve mentioned elsewhere I’m a big fan of Tara Fitzgerald, an actress who combines beauty and a keen eye for a good role. And Colm Meany really needs to be considered alongside of Patrick Stewart when thinking of the best actor to come to prominence in Star Trek.

The film did so-so in the box office, probably saved from failure by Hugh Grant’s name. Writer/Director Monger went six years before directing another film (made in Greece) and has been doing a little TV, but has no long list of credits. I’d add him to my list of directors who I wish were given another chance.

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*How the film is billed if you’re too lazy to write out the entire title.

**As others have noted, Wales is so poor that they cannot afford many vowels in their place names.