c1967-Present
Members: Phil Austin, Peter Bergman, David Ossman, and Philip Proctor
Wikipedia Link
Firesign Theater Website
Back around 1970, I was at a party. The record supplying the music was done, and I put another one one. A comedy record. People were complaining that they wanted music, and that they couldn't hear what was happening, and meanwhile the party conversations went on, ignoring everything. But after about ten minute, the group slowly became quiet, so they could catch everything being said.
The record was from the Firesign Theater.
They were a group of four writers/performers who started out doing radio plays and quickly graduated to records. They were as big a revolution in comedy as Monty Python's Flying Circus, who were starting out around the same time.
The group took its name from astrology -- all four members were Fire Signs* -- with a nod to the old Fireside Theater radio show. They took the conventions of radio drama and added psychedelic sensibilities and wove it all into a dense collection of comic brilliance. In the early 70s, you could say, "Wait a minute, Danger. What about my pickle?" and people would go off on long riff and quotes of the absurdist dialog that were their stock in trade. The Firesign Theater created more in-joke quotes than anyone except Python:
- "That's just a two-bit ring from a Crackerback jox."
- "She's no fun. She fell right over."
- "Antelope Freeway, one half mile."
- "What kind of chump do you take me for?" "First class."
- "I can shout. Don't hear you."
- "And you can believe me, because I never lie, and I'm always right."
- "You can wait here in the sitting room, or you can sit here in the waiting room."
(Yes, if you know the Firesign Theater, these are as funny as "This is an Ex-parrot!")
At their best, the Firesign theater was far ahead of its time. They would, for instance, stop to listen if they had said thing on the other side of the record, and one half of a phone conversation on one album would have the other half showing up on another. Their work was filled with social commentary (some prescient), slapstick, anything-for-a-joke humor, and more. It never got stale, no matter how often you listened.
They started out in radio on the west coast, but were signed with Columbia Records, and put out their first album, Waiting for the Electrician or Someone Like Him in 1968. It consisted of only four tracks. "Temporarily Humbolt County" was a bitter satire on manifest destiny, but the true genius of the album was the title track, which took up the entire second side of the album, about a traveler lost in a country where everything is confusion.
The album was successful enough for a second one, this entitled How Can You Be Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All? It really only had two cuts: the title one, a skewed look at American consumer culture and their best known piece (and comedy classic):
Announcer: Los Angeles. He walks again by night! Out of the fog. Into the smog (cough cough). Relentlessly. Ruthlessly (“I wonder where Ruth is”). Doggedly (dogs bark) Toward his weekly meeting with . . . the unknown. At 4th and Drucker he turns left, at Drucker and 4th he turns right, he crosses McArthur Park & walks into a great sandstone building! ("Oh my nose!") Groping for the door, he steps inside, and climbs the 13 steps to his office. He walks in. He’s ready for mystery. He’s ready for excitement. He’s ready for anything. He’s…
Nick Danger (picking up ringing phone): Nick Danger, third eye!
Phone Voice: Yes. I want to order a pizza to go, and no anchovies.
The Further Adventures of Nick Danger, Third Eye is a parody of radio detective shows, with the hero meeting a Peter Lorre type mysterious man. And a search for Melanie Haber . . . . Audrey Faber. . . Susan Underhill . . . Betty Jo Bialowski!** This is the point where most people became fans.
They topped this with their next release, Don't Crush That Dwarf, Hand Me the Pliers, a parody of the teen "let's-put-on-a-show" movies of the 40s, but with their usual twists and surreal humor. There was only one track, as they followed George Leroy Tirebiter, former child star, in his film High School Madness as he tried to find out who stole Morse Science High, as it gets mixed in with a Korean war movie. The two plots run parallel -- or rather, are twisted like rope.
It's actually pretty pointless to try to describe. You just listen. Rolling Stone has called this "the greatest comedy record ever made," and I certainly agree. Though it's not anything you pick up on immediately. The jokes are so multilayered that it takes several listens to begin to catch them all, and the more you listen the funnier it gets. It was a pinnacle of comedy, as amazing in its own way as Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
The next album, I Think We're All Bozos on This Bus was a slight dropoff (understandable). They followed that with a collection of their radio shows called Dear Friends, showing their earlier comedy. But their next album, Not Insane was a disappointment, and they never really recovered, even though they did some good work afterwards.
The group remains together today, doing live shows of their work, and the various permutations also released albums over the years. Proctor and Bergman worked together,*** and Ossman and Austin also did solo work. But they never made the break into TV or films, and they became forgotten by all but their long-term fans.
But for their first three albums, they put forth a brand of comedy that was all their own. No one has ever come close.
________________________________________________
* An Aries, a Leo, and two Sagittariuses.
**He knew her as Nancy.
***I saw them in the mid-70s.
65 comments:
Firesign associate and official archivist Taylor Jessen has unearthed, restored and produced a phenomenal compendium: all of the group's live radio broadcasts from 1970 to 1972 - 80+ hours worth of shows, many of which have never seen the light of day until now, with an accompanying book. Go to firesigntheatre dot com and check out Duke of Madness Motors, you won't regret it.
I've been listening to nearly all their albums again recently. I'd agree about 'ahead of their time' -- but I think the time they were ahead of is maybe one of those alternate futures, like the ones with the flying cars.
Comedy today still hasn't caught up with them, and doesn't even seem to be trying anymore.
As Catherwood said, "Forward! Into the Past!!"
oh, boy i think i just found what i have been looking for for so long.
is this the group that put together, County Radio, with Vern the mailman, Chuck Fred one of the hosts, and of course, the epic star of the show, Bobby Jean McMurphy--oh please let it be so
oh durranty, oh durrannty, you are my home town!
and how do I make my voice do that?
Brilliant, admitedly uneven, but you missed the top notch: "Everything You Know Is Wrong". On par with "...pliers" IMHO. Cool site. Thanks
Chuck mentioned how they never broke into television and yet he's wrong. In the early to mid 80's, they were on USA (I believe) for a brief run. It was great to see them in action. However, I'll take the old albums any ol' day. Being able to listen and use one's imagination on the sounds and the characters, was well worth the time.
Follow in your books and repeat after me, as we learn the next three words in Turkish.
I am a wonderful mother. I introduced my children to Firesign Theater when they were teenagers. Actually, that may have been a mistake, now that I think about it. How else do you explain text messages from my daughter that say nothing more than, "Why are they still calling them novels?"
You would not believe how many people don't get that, even after I explain it to them. I fear for the state of irony in our society. I really do.
Anyway, the kids were amazed to find that so very many strange things I say without even thinking about it are actually FT lines. They apparently always wondered what, "Cluck the duck" meant. Now they know. Not a damn thing.
My kids grew up listening to those albums! And yes, they are fine upstanding citizens, with a great sense of humor.
Nice review!
I'm afraid I don't agree about Bozos. As a working Computer Scientist, I find it amazingly prescient, and some of the material is awesome if you understand where it's coming from. "Robot's Rules of Order", for example, is the kind of phrase that is still jaw-droppingly funny to geeks like me. (If you don't get it, c.f. Robert's Rules of Order and Asimov's Three Laws of Robotics.) I think the album's popularity suffered from its audience's unfamiliarity with its source material, which is a shame.
Some of the material on Not Insane was later released as Anythynge You Want To (Shakespeare's Lost Comedie), which is as far as I'm concerned as brilliant as anything FT ever did. Like their genre-defining parody of noir radio in Nick Danger, this is the genre-defining Shakespeare parody; not just years ahead of its time but unlikely ever to be replicated in its incisiveness, insight, humor and above all use of language. It took FT another eight years after Not Insane to fully complete this work, and another twenty after that to get it released properly, and the maturity of the final version definitely shows.
Similarly, Hemlock Stones and the Tale of the Giant Rat of Sumatra is arguably the best Sherlock Holmes parody ever. It's a bit, er, crude, but absolutely brilliant--a must-listen for any true Sherlockian or FT fan, especially in the current age of all-things-Sherlock.
Prescient? Hah! They freaking prognosticated the GPS 30 years ahead of its time! (Antelope freeway, 1/2 mile). Amazing. 40+ years and im hearing things layered in for thenfirst time... This, despite having memorized the albums back in the 70's, to the point of precision that i could speak in parallel with the album, turn the volume off, come back 15 minutes later and still be Perfect sync.
What have they done to me....(screams maniacally!)
"I know i know, lets turn him on his head! There- you see? Now its morning!"
It's a little scary - the effect the Firesign Theatre had on listeners. Perhaps it was because we were so young, but I know many people who quote Waiting for the Electrician to this day, including me. It somehow got hardwired into our brains. Was it a Communist plot to make young Americans go insane? hmmmm.
Looking for the source of the quote"AROAR,HARR!-cavalry officer's unitelligible order....one trooper says to the other "what'd he say?"... The other trooper answers AROAR,HARR!...thought it was Mel Brooks,but couldn't find it. It's either FST or too much ganja in my misspent youth.
Not to be out dated, they went on to do DOOM DOT BUST and Give me immortality or give me Death. And the Shakespearean Anythinge You Want to too. Now where is my catnip ?
I'll also respectfully disagree regarding Bozos, in my estimation their best work. Talk about prognostication, computer hackers,(ah, Clem), computer viruses, software back doors (open your gate, Doctor), anti-virus software (the three Macs, here comes Deputy Dan, I read Gypsy, Doctor). The whole concept of "Do you remember the Future? Forget it!" to crash the entire Future Fair system, while Macs 2 & 3 are clamoring, "Forget it/Don't forget it!" Beyond brilliant, in my humble opinion.
Proctor and Bergman's "TV Or Not TV", also a hacking theme, is a close second.
...lets talk about your car, its screaming ' wash me please'...still cracks me up
Is Porgie still helping porcelain make the bed?
My Brother and I still quote FT and there's probably less then, %0.00001 that understand.
Helping Porcelain make the bed--"C-Coming, mother!" "Oh, he's so good with the help."
I have Duke of Madness Motors and listen to Dear Friends on cross-country drives...a lot of improvisation, it's great. The Lucky Duck Garage is offering a free grease and lube job to all newlyweds, let Dan Lucky at her with his wet pump gun and she'll feel like jelly for the next ten thousand rides...Leg O' The Crow Restaurant...Bob's Brazerko Lounge, under the telephone poles in the exclusive Multi-Mart Shopping Center...
As for gagabarjarjar who asked a few years ago in this thread about the radio station parody with Bubba and Chuck Fred, that was the National Lampoon Radio Hour circa 1974, KORN radio from Durante Iowa.
Fully factory air conditioned air from our fully factory equipped air conditioned factory--I think
Fully factory air conditioned air from our fully factory equipped air conditioned factory--I think
I've been playing these albums more since the deaths of Bergman and Austin. Like many of the other commenters, I use phrases from their work daily. I have a blog called "I'm Always Right and Never Lie" (yeah, I altered the quote, probably accidentally). When I heard episodes of "Nick Carter, Master Detective" on an old-time radio show I realized where Nick Danger came from (with a hint of "Johnny Dollar" thrown in--you know, "the man with the action-packed expense account"). They had an ability to draw us into a strange world that showed us things about ours that we never knew. I agree about "Giant Rat"--I love Sherlock Holmes and they sent it up beautifully, though their characters were obviously more influenced by the movie versions than the original stories. I do think "Bozos" was a dropoff, though a still brilliant work. If it were the only thing they'd done, it would be a one-of-a-kind bit of genius. I saw them live just once, I think in 1973 at Princeton's McCarter Theater. They were damned good, and that's not just the grass talking.
"It's a beautiful car with doors to match!"
The phrase "She's no fun she fell right over" is still burned into my brain after a very long hiking trip with a couple of FT memorizers... Which album (?) is that from?
"She's no fun . . . " was from How Can You Be in Two Places at Once If you're not anywhere at all on both sides, actually ("Didn't I say that on the other side of the record?").
After 40 odd years, I still find myself saying 'It's just this little chromium switch here" to explain some obvious epiphany. And I always cracked up when I heard the refrigerator ad which touted "Close the door and the light stays on!" - Both from How Can You Be...
Saw them in concert twice, and they were awesome!!
A great collection of insightful minds!
Love the song Nazi Goring, from TV or Not TV, and Not Insane, from Not Insane.
Everything you say is right (and you never lie) but it appears i am left to defend the honor of "Everything you know is wrong". It is a towering pinnacle of achievement, every bit as convolutedly quotable as "the original 4". dogs flew spaceships...the aztecs invented the vacation...the reappearance of bob hind and his travelogue tv show "the golden hind"...
in terms of dropoffs, the way i see their output is the "original 4" were all brilliant in different ways. then, like the rock groups of the era, they released a number of live albums, outtake albums, and solo projects of varying quality. the great "tv or not tv" and the just as great "how time flies" to ones i don't like quite as much.
their return is marked by the giant rat, already referenced, everything you know...(my favorite) and the slightly less great "in the next world you're on your own" which deserves a place in the pantheon, if only for the dead cat commercial and the immortal line "eat fascist death, flaming media pigs" (er...)
that was the album which lost them their major label contract, and i kinda lost track after that (ie, i stopped memorizing their albums). so i will leave it to others to extol the virtues of their later stuff.
sorry if this comment is too long, but this looks like the end...or is it only the begin... [coyote howls] no, it's the end.
I was in Frankfurt Germany in 1970 and listened to this program on the Armed Forces Network on a weekly basis. The one program I remember most was a "Stardrag" episode. The space craft, crew, Captain Quirk, and Mister Smock, had struck a Space-Turkey deflecting the ship off course. As the skit progressed, Smock would occasionally chime in and "report" the ship was some distance "off course". Astute listeners, as we were, the distance in light-years would progressively increase as the minutes went by and we could estimate what Smock would say next. Later, as the crew determined they needed a spare part to repair damage caused by the collision with the "Space-Turkey", Smock reported the cost was trillions of dollars, even though the part was only 63-cents, the delivery cost were very high because they were 855-trillion, 721-million, 418-thousand, 778 point 3-miles off course captain. Another laugh was just before they struck the turkey, on their monitors they heard, "I am the God of...", CRASH! The whole skit was a terrific laugh. I'd love to hear that one again.
The anonymous who asked may well have shuffled off the coil by now, but "Aroor-HARR!" was from a movie. TEXAS ACROSS THE RIVER, I think. Whoever was leading the cavalry would shout it out. Near the end of the movie, I think the leader of the Native Americans used it as well.
Also, it's so tempting to try and correct all the misquotes in the comments. Must clench teeth and refrain.
I never got to see them live, but Denver's KFML simulcast Proctor & Bergman from Ebbets Field (a Boulder night club, if my sources are correct), and I recorded that as well as I could, and still have it. I only wish I could have recorded their earlier badinage with the KFML announce at the studio beforehand, with ad libs. The thing I remember is when one of them coughed and apologized for having a rare tropical disease. Then the announcer coughed, and they said, "I see you're getting it too!" Only then did I catch on why they were coughing.
(Just noticed the comment before. I know I've heard that skit on Dr. Demento. It was a comedy troupe whose name I've conveniently forgotten, but Dr. D has a website that might provide you with the details.)
I've heard bits of this bunch and am still trying to get into them. The author mentions Monty Python as a comparison but personally I'd suggest listening to those who inspired MP - The Goon Show written by Spike Milligan. Spike truly was a linguistic acrobat, a true genius. His incredible books especially "Puckoon' and his 4 part trilogy about his time as a soldier during WW2. "Hitler and my part in his downfall" That series ended up to about 7 books.
I CANNOT recommend The Goons enough.
I grew up in Los Angeles and remember seeing the boys doing tv commercials for Jack Poet Volkswagen on Sunset. This was a few years before I was introduced to their records in ‘71. Anyone else remember seeing them on air?
It's all something I love.
Ebbets Field was in Downtown Denver, on Lawrence between 14th and 15th. Proctor & Bergman performed 'The Channel 85 Story' there in Dec 1973. (Noteworthy: 850 KOA-AM was just around the corner.) They returned in 1977 and did 'TV or Not TV' which was simulcast on KFML in Boulder. I was comp'd tix courtesy of KYSN in Colorado Spgs, cuz I was a broadcasting student at El Paso Community College at the time... Too much fun.
Listening to DEAR FRIENDS at the moment...
Looking for the Escalante and Dominguez expedition where they find the Stinking Desert and National Cobalt Testing Range!
Was this the same group in Denver that did live improv on the radio to a show that we, the audience, watched on TV with the sound off? They did a soap opera noonish during the week and a midnight movie on Saturdays. So fun! This was early 70s. I am 95% sure it was FST.
Pamela, that was High Street. KFML used to broadcast them once a week, and they'd pick a movie to make up a sound track to. I remember a suburban angst one called NO MONEY DOWN, and I recall they did TWELVE ANGRY MEN, among others. After a while, TV stations decided they were upset by it, possibly because they were dubbing ads for KFML's sponsors into ads for the TV station's sponsors.
When the local TV stations cracked down, High Street tried other venues, like taking the act to a theater and doing it. I wasn't in Denver or Boulder, so it was harder to know where stuff was happening. I seem to recall hearing they had gone to California. When a group called "The L.A. Connection" started doing "Mad Movies" in syndication, I wondered if there was any connection.
High Street also released at least one comedy side of original material. I heard it a couple of times on KFML. It might have been before they did the movies—it was all a while ago.
I made my poor niece cry (but got a big laugh out of the rest of the family) one Thanksgiving when I told her, "Don't eat with your hands, Heather, use your entrenching tool!"
(Also fondly remember High Street on KFML, Tuesday nights. Being improv, it was pretty hit or miss. There were times they struggled, but when they were on, they were very on. Most memorable line: "Chivalry is dead, I guess." "So is vaudeville, Shirley.")
Been listening the troupe for 50 years. Nothing comes close to that. The pinnacle for me was seeing them live at the Paramount Theater in Seattle in 1992 at what was billed as The 25th Reunion. I was even able to run backstage and get their autographs on a posterboard I brought. When I said my name was “Jim” they all said in unison “Clem”... I kid you not. I was in heaven.
It had been requested by the guys for attendees to bring a squeak toy... I don't know the capacity of the Paramount but imagine a sold out show where everyone had a squeak toy! I could have died that night... A Happy Man...
“Why he's no fun he fell right over...”
Long live the Poop!
ps. I saw cameras... I'm wondering if there is a video of that show!?
"Vote for me: I never lie and I'm always right."
Who could ask for more?
OK, it's July 30, 2019. It's paused now, but I'm listening to the album.
I just caught a reference that went over my head in the many times since I first listened in 1970. So 49 years later, I get something I should have(?) understood way back then.
So, I'm going to resume listening; maybe I'll catch something else tat I originally missed . . .
I was already a longtime FT fan when they did a live show at Zellerbach (UC Berkeley) in the 1970s. A guard stopped me as I was going in with ice cream, saying I couldn't take food inside. "Okay," I replied, handing him my cone. "Hold this for me til I come out." He took it from me, looking confused, and I thought, wow, this almost belongs in the act!
The guys were fabulous, and the audience participation was a hit. We all found it enormously satisfying to yell "Fuck you!" and "What is reality?" at the More Science High School principal, who yelled "Fuck you, too!" as he exited. How I wish somebody had filmed that evening's performance!
A gentleman (stober?) mentioned a Star Trek parody, attributing it to the Boys. The piece he is referring to is actually called Star Trip, from the a duo named Congress of Wonders, and appears on their album Revolting. Obviously a original Star Trek parody, it is at least as inventive and hilarious as many of the Firesign skits and is similar in style, containing many memorable lines as it relates the adventures of Captain Quirk (or Kwirk as it is spelled in the somewhat inaccurate 'lyric' transcriptions floating about the Interweb), Mister Smirk, crew members Lenin, Lt. Ubangi, engineer Limey, etc. And yes, it starts with an encounter with a giant space turkey ("Behold, I am an angel of the Lord..."). And the ship is increasingly, logarithmicly off course. If your are a Firesign fan, worth tracking down. There is a point where an alarm sound was needed. Cue in the "please hang up" tones generated by a touch-tone phone, exotic at the time to us East Coasters who still had rotary phones, but in retrospect as dated as the 'hip' drug references littering Pigeon Park, the other notable skit on the record in which which Phil Lesh and Jerry Garcia are reunited, in their dotage, on a park bench. "Oh, no! Here comes the cocaine helicopter!" "Kids these days, no sense of proportion!"
I am familiar with Congress of Wonders, and yes, their Star Trek parody was great.
2 postmen times 3 animal control officers divided by 4 gas meter readers equals how many avendable, integrated community workers. Computer your answer now! Good!!! Did you remember to carry the bum??
Anonymous, had left a comment on the post "Firesign Theater";
I enjoyed your comments about that skit. In my original post, I mentioned I'd listened to that broadcast in the winter of 1969 while I was in Frankfurt, Germany. The Army radio station played it. As it's been several decades, my memory may be foggy, I was certain that the 'Smok' character reported the cost of repairs would be billions of $$ because the 65-cent part had to come so far after the collision with the space-turkey put them off course so many billions of miles. Thanx to your memory of which record it may be on, I will search. Thanks, again, for your comments... as I remembered everything you mentioned, and it seemed you had, either heard it recently, or your memory of 1969 must be extraordinary... were you there?
FWIW, Dr. Demento played the track many times, and there is an archive of Dr D's shows, which can be streamed on a paying basis. (*cough*AUDACITY*cough*) I can't quite believe it's not more easily available than that.
An old high school buddy and I exchange emails and always end with a Firesign quote. It is the tie that binds us together. Great stuff and still funny today - if you get the cultural references.
Q.E.D.
Just finished dueling with Firesign quotes with a new pal on a jigsaw site of all things. Did you read the book? Ok culture references— but maybe you have to be in the culture. — ask that cop who is knocking at your door — you ain’t got no friends on the left. UMCP in 71 rocked by student? revolution created an open university of classes at night run by anybody. FT was one, we listened to the albums again, well new for some.
I just obtained "Anythinge You Want To," with the third version of their Shakespeare extravaganza, which I literally bought with blood money (a gift card from the Red Cross for multiple donations of my precious Type O- over the past year). I pretty much have their other available releases and videos, so it's nice to get something that's at least partly new.
I made a friend in high school one snowy day when school was canceled and we were waiting for a bus to take us home. We were watching false alarms as buses started toward us and then went away. "He's coming around," someone said. "He's coming around, folks!" I replied. "He's gonna be OKAY!" said Mike, and we finished together "...and ready to play Symptom Six of BEAT THE REAPER!"
I understand Mike's a standup comic now. Haven't been in contact, but always wishing him luck and lotsa laffs.
Was there a Firesign quote where one guy asks another about his support for a particular candidate. His reply, "I'd vote for anyone but him. I'd vote for a blender."
It was National Lampoon's "Radio Dinner" LP, I think in "The Miracle of Democracy" (by Tony Hendra, which I don't have right at hand): "Anybody but Nixon, man. A blender. Anything!" The gist of the whole track is that the Democrats run a car against Nixon, so he has to be a car too.
Kip W. figured it out for me. It was National Lampoon's "Radio Dinner" LP, I think in "The Miracle of Democracy" (by Tony Hendra, which I don't have right at hand): "Anybody but Nixon, man. A blender. Anything!" The gist of the whole track is that the Democrats run a car against Nixon, so he has to be a car too. I replied, Thank you Kip. After I posted the question I started to dig a little deeper. It was fun. I’d forgotten about Radio Dinner. All I could come up with was Warren Zevon’s ‘Pitiful Me’. “She was a credit to her gender, she put me through some changes boy, sort of like a Waring blender” Dan Daly
Many many lines are still banging around in my head to this day. Indeed, the reason I found this blog is because this morning I was thinking (and I KNOW I have some of the words wrong): "I'll never forget Ahn May, served my every need, did a grand job on my ankules too" and thought I'd try to find out what the actual line was.
I was an extremely high Harvard sophomore the first time I heard Waiting for the Electrician. I have never been the same.
Kip: The name of the Radio Dinner track was "Profiles in Chrome" (an obvious play on Kennedy's "Profiles in Courage").
Firesign Theater is a timeless joy. Here we are in 2020 with a pandemic and divisive politics and a strong Black Lives Matter movement and we can still find fabulous laughter with these guys. We need their comedy right now.
All the aforementioned star trek stuff was Congress of wonders. Stoned ranger, classic Pigeon park and Star trip I believe and others.
Not firesign theater, Congress of wonders!
"One shining STEEL RAIL!"
My posted response to a friend's comment on a math post was "Did you remember to carry the Bum?" Appropriate in the moment but I can't remember the album it came from...any help out there? (wordpecker@peak.org) Early on I committed the first 4 albums to memory, line for line...most of Not Insane but sorta lost the thread after Roller Maidens.
"Don't Crush That Dwarf..." See if it's on YouTube.
Nicky, Nicky, Nicky... are you all right?
Open the curtain, Fred.
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